CAN DIE LA!

OH MY GOD. 

You're so bloody dramatic and no one can say ANYTHING nowadays without upsetting you cos you're so freaking sensitive. You walk around and yell at everyone and when people tell you dont yell you get all emotional. 

WTFrack man. I can just DIE like this. :O

Sick

Still feeling sick, and now extra pissed of with her.
She's really being such a cow about this, and complaining to everyone about such a small thing which WASNT EVEN MY IDEA OR MY FAULT.
I really have no mood or patience to deal with this la okay. Get your drama and all your emotional baggage out of my way, because I have my own to deal with and you're just annoying me even more.
It's not enough that I'm effing sick and that I've got fuggin swollen ankles and fuggin painful headaches, oho, no it's not. You add to my shitty feelings with your drama.
My life is complicated enough without all this kay. I dont care if you make them all think that I'm a bitch, I really dont. Because KARMA is a bitch and she will strike back.

*sigh. My head hurts like hell. :/ Help.

Angry!

IAMSOANGRY! And upset and I feel so neglected and unloved and uncared for. Like wtfrack? And I DONT think it's just me pmsing.

*sigh. I need braing surgery.

I dont like.

So the thing is, we had a plan. And our plan got screwed up by we all know what, but you went ahead anyway and no one told me. I know this might sound pathetic, but I feel left out eh. Why make nice when you're not going to play nice? Especially when I've been trying so hard to be nice and be there for you right now. *sigh.

Excuse my whining. I've been having a really shit time. Loadsa crap happening, loads of nonsense going through my head. I dont like this.

Sometimes, friends suck.

What's the point of friends when they keep fucking disappointing you?
It's not every so often that I invite my friends for things, and when I do, it means that you're special to me and I want you there.

And if I can make the effort to travel back and forth for you people so many times for random parties that you guys are having for the fun of it, when i so clearly live the furthest away, then I dont see why it's so hard for you people to do the same. After all, it's only my 18th birthday; and i celebrate it all the time right? Fuck it la.

You guys dont know how hard it is to be so far away from all of you. You guys see each other all the time, a lot in fact. I can only come back every once in awhile because dont forget i have to divide my time between two families and church stuff as well.

You're not very fair to me, and i dont like it.

I am always right.

Just goes to show you that I am always right. ALWAYS. Remember when I blogged this "Please don't break my heart; I might crash and burn" a few days ago, yeah. I was right. Even when I don't want to believe it, I am always right. My instincts never fail me, my refusal to believe in my instincts fail me. Why? Because when my instincts suggest that someone is a fuckface, I am a fool enough to believe in giving them the benefit of the doubt. Because I am just like that, I like to believe in the best of people. you'd think after all I've been through, that I'd be more hard-hearted than that and that I'd learn not to trust anyone. But no. I can't bring myself to.

But you know what, all of this just proves that I am a better person than you. Because I really did give with all my heart, and you didn't give a fuck. You only pretended you did to give me the illusion that you cared because we both know what you really wanted. And it wasn't me. You know what upsets me the most and what reduces me to tears? the fact that I almost let myself fall for you. The fact that I almost, ALMOST, was willing to give you so much of myself. I gave you more than I gave most guys.

And you know what I feel now? I feel like a fool. I feel like I've been played, again. And you can't even apologise for it. You don't even try to explain to me. Step up and take responsibility.

Mood to Bitch

Guess who's in the mood to bitch. ;)
And for once in a really long time, I actually have a valid reason to bitch.
Why? Because people like this GIRL just piss me off.
Let's call her Monica. (Not her real name, simply because I am a nice person and even if i want to rip her to bloody pieces, I would never intentionally tarnish someone's reputation so badly, especially not someone I dont know.. except for dickman and a certain german-punjab girl, because THEY are totally different stories).

See, I, Joanna, am not the kind of person who randomly bitches about people, not unless they have done something to hurt me or piss me off. If someone were to do shit to my friends, yeah I'd get pissed and probably defend them if my friends weren't around to defend themselves, but I would NOT bitch about them. Because, quite frankly, IDONTGIVEAFUCK about such chilidish demeanors AND I hapopen to have better things to do with my life.

So this girl, Monica. Such a self-absorbed perasan as hell BITCH! Lol. Yes, that's me, get straight to the point. This stupid girl actually believes that someone as busy as me, could possibly give a damned to bitch about her. Whatever it is, the problems YOU have with my FRIENDS, you take it up with them. you don't involve me in it, because CLEARLY, i don't belong there.

And for her to actually have the gall to accuse ME of bitching about her, like HELO. Get over yourself,. First of all, I dont even know you. So clearly, I WOULD have better things to do like for example say.. oh i dont know, freaking STUDY.. so that I dont have to end up doing extra semesters because I failed certain subjects, like SOME stupid people.

Second of all, if you REALLY want to make an issue out of this, grow up and let's talk about it face-to-face. I don't like all this sending emails and messages on networking sites. That's just so childish. And bear in mind, I am the blogger here, I am the one who was publish articles, I am the one who's language and logic is good enough to kick you down, shove a horse's ass over your head for it to shit AND put you in your place. So, really, sending ME a written message? How very adult of you *rolls eyes (note the sarcasm please) .. and also how very STUPID of you.

Honestly, this kind of shit is exactly what I was GLAD to leave high school for. So really, take your high school drama and bullshit and shove it up your nostril (it will hurt more there). And really, the next time you Monica and people like you who do shit like this see me along the corridor in college, do yourself a favour and get out of my face; because if i HAVE to be a bitch about something, I most definitely WILL.

and yes, i realise i said i dont bitch about people i dont know, but that's only when they've done nothing to me. Monica here, has pissed me off. So, my reasons are totally justified. :P Plus, my blog; not yours. If you dont like what i have to say, then shut up and go away. You're just a click away, ANYWAY.
note; it's about to be a .. girlfight!

Bloody Malaysian

See, THIS is one of the many reasons i hate stupid malaysians. Because they can be SO inconsiderate of other people around them. Today, I was taking the rapid kl right, and i was carrying my HEAVY laptop (i think Kylethelaptop is getting fatter) and my handbag AND my books right. And there's was no place so i had to stand fine. This stuppit chinese guy was sititng in front of me next to some woman. When the woman got down, the stuppit man refused to move in to let anyone else sit la! like wtf. He even put his hand on the EMPTY seat next to him so no one could go and sit there. And of course i wanted to sit because no kidding my stuff was heavy shit! and other people were looking at him, and the cocky bastard knew it, and STILL refused to move. Seriously, that is just so typical Malaysian. I hope he never EVER gets a seat in public transportation ever again. Stupidman.

YES! that's him! i took his picture.

Bloodyselfishchinaman.

sigh.

Bitching.

What is up with girls these days?
Why are you so fucking self absorbed to believe that I, JOANNA AMBROSE, could actually giveashit to waste my breath to bitch about YOU of all people?
You got a problem with someone else, take it up with her. Why attack me, an innocent bystander in all of this? I have NEVER said anything about you. The only thing I do is agree when my friends say things about you. So YOU, get the fuck out of my face. and DONT piss me off.
I have no patience for this.
I didn;t go to college to make friends,although i'm glad i've made some awesome ones, neither do i go to college to make enemies.
I have a life to giveashit about, not you and the shit you do.
so fucking get over youself.

Don't be Such a Cockyshit.

Look, if you have a problem with someone or something, there's a proper way of saying it or addressing it. There is no need to be so darned cocky and rude about it. and putting a smiley at the end of something so sarcastic doesnt change that fact. If it's such a problem, and you dont like people spamming ur fucking wall, then freaking click "hide" and get over it. It's not like you and a certain other person dont do it. It's just that other people are patient enough to put up with it so they havent been rude like you were. Get over yourself boy.

UNFAIR!!

Seriously, how UNFAIR can life get?
EXREMELY.
That's how much.


Three tickets. and TWO V.I.P passes.
To go and see Blackeyed Peas in freaking sunway for freaking Arthur's Day.
And you know what?
Everyfreakinghuman in my family has gone for it and stupid me is stuck at home.
Mum and dad took the VIP passes.
Steph took all three tickets and she's going with obviously Meet and her friends.


And WHY can stupid me go? Because stupid me is not freaking 18 yet.
Like wth right?
Fuckfuckfuckkity hell.
Ihateeveryone.
Lifeissounfair.
I blame my mother and father for having me so bloody late in the year.
Peoplesuck! :(

Sick of dealing with everyone. People like you. Lying, backstabbing hypocrites who say one thing but do another.Go suck on eggs b*tch.

I hate..

You know what i hate a lot?

I hate it when the guy you really like starts flirting with a friend of yours

And she flirts back knowing how you feel about him.

I hate it when people are rude to you and snap at you when you try to talk about emotional pain you have.

Why can't you just be nice and say "look im sorry, im not int he mood will talk to you later" or some other polite shit like that?

I hate it when I always go back to my hometown and at least i let them know im coming back there so if they wanna meet up we can.

But when they come anywhere NEAR here they don't ever bother calling me just to see if i'd wanna meet up or something like that.

Then why even bother telling me that you've been here?

I know i'm being a bit sensitive and shit.

But here's it :

first of all, it goes against all girl rules in the world to even look twice at a guy you KNOW your friend is into. you're just like sarahfckingewhoredickman who cant keep her hands of her friends' men. First is was Ruth's Anson, then MY Josh. Stupid bitch, i HATE girls like this.

Second of all, i HATE rude people. So next time, and this goes out to everyone, if you're going to be rude to me, dont fcking bother TALKING to me! just go away!

Third of all.. okay..

I live freaking far away now. i know, and i dont expect my friends from back home to come all the way every week or whatever shit.

But its just not fair.

They all still live in the same town. They see each other all the time.

They get to meet up for lunch whenever, they see each other in school

I feel really left out and i dont care if right here i sound like a whiny child because this is just how i feel.

Rathes had come here with Kavs a couple of times and not once have they called me when they're here.

Dheren and Dherej came here and didnt even tell me.

Ann came here to see Mo, and not me, though I've asked her so many times to come over.

I'm not angry

It just hurts.

You guys are my best friends and it kills me that i can't see you as often anymore.

I love you guys tons and i wish i could come back more often and spend more time with you all but the fact is i cant.

And i know you guys feel like i've found new friends in college and shit but as much as i love them too, they dont compare to you guys.

You, the twins i've known since i was 12 and have become really close to.

You, the guys i spent most of my days after SPM with, the ones i tell my secrets to and shit like tht.

You, my best friend ever who's my soulmate that i freaking love.

I miss you guys so much sometimes.

And it hurts me that you guys dont try to make the effort to see me as much as i do to see you guys.

Note ; Sometimes love comes around, and then knocks you down.

Malaysian Transport and Stinky Turbanator

I swear to freakingmosesinheaven that i bloody hate freakingstupidMALAYSIANPUBLICTRANSPORT!

Stupid damned trains and buses are ALWAYS late! even the damned RAPID KL which totally defeats and contradicts its name because it is in fact NOT at all "rapid" in keeping up with its stupid schedule. and even the stupid LRT which is supposed to be pretty fast. shesusbejeeshush!!

They should just DIE. seriously. stupid mistertrainandbusdriver should just DIE! The freaking KTM was 45 minutes late today!!!!! seriously, is this what our country's public transport has slumped to?

And the stuuuupid people taking this public transport are no better. They are all bloody rude and just push and shove to get in the damned tube. i mean SERIOUSLY! if its full its full la! why the fuck must you push your sweaty stinky selves against other people!its not going to help ANYONE! and seriously some of these people are REALLY SMELLY! i mean HELO! have you NOT heard of SOAP? or maybe er.. there's this very "unknown" invention called DEODORANT!!!

some of these people should just die la. especially the stupid turbanator that was next to me on the train today. im calling him that cos he was the ULTIMATE stink bomb AND he kept rubbing into everyone's personal space. ew.

go away la you retarded stinkface.

*sigh

Note ; Next time anyone invades my PERSONAL space w/out permission, i am crushing nuts.

Joanna is not a happy child anymore.
You know what. i think i have a disease or something.
Like maybe Bipolar disease or something.
Cos its like, sometimes i can be so bloody incredibly happy, and the next i am sad and so unhappy.
Bipolar would be a better explanation, rather than say that I am just an emotional person
because yes i am emotional
but i dont like to think that i can be overly emotional.

i hate people.
ok not really.
i dont hate all people.
just most people.

you know what else i hate?
i hate being the girl that is every guy's best friend.
cos really, that's what i am.
sometimes, its not such a bad thing.
but other times, i really hate it. its so fucked up.

i hate myself.
what is it about me that..
ok. nvm. forget about it.

long story short.
im upset.
i hate it that my friends have become her friends and somehow im in the background now and i dont matter.
i hate it that as much as i am there for them, when it comes to me, i'm on my own
i hate that im so trusting of people that only end up hurting me.
i hate that i am me.

Note ; i've been travelling on this road too long, trying to find my way back home, the old me is dead and gone. i turn my head to east, i don't see nobody by my side.

Too much anger inside
it's tearing me apart slowly.

Somebody HELP!

Just grab me and slap me. i just about need it right now!