Joanna is not a happy child anymore.
You know what. i think i have a disease or something.
Like maybe Bipolar disease or something.
Cos its like, sometimes i can be so bloody incredibly happy, and the next i am sad and so unhappy.
Bipolar would be a better explanation, rather than say that I am just an emotional person
because yes i am emotional
but i dont like to think that i can be overly emotional.

i hate people.
ok not really.
i dont hate all people.
just most people.

you know what else i hate?
i hate being the girl that is every guy's best friend.
cos really, that's what i am.
sometimes, its not such a bad thing.
but other times, i really hate it. its so fucked up.

i hate myself.
what is it about me that..
ok. nvm. forget about it.

long story short.
im upset.
i hate it that my friends have become her friends and somehow im in the background now and i dont matter.
i hate it that as much as i am there for them, when it comes to me, i'm on my own
i hate that im so trusting of people that only end up hurting me.
i hate that i am me.

Note ; i've been travelling on this road too long, trying to find my way back home, the old me is dead and gone. i turn my head to east, i don't see nobody by my side.