you can't break something that's already broken

josh, my ex. says he'll give me my space for a month to think about what i need to do.
the thing is, i dont know WHAT i'm gonna do.
i really don't.
and the thing is, my girlfriends think i should NOT give him another chance and that i should move one.
and my guy friends think i SHOULD give him another chance.
i see a pattern here, there's a pattern here, do you see a PATTERN here?!

god. i can understand though why they think that way. the girls imagine themselves in my place and the guys imagine themselves in his place and then decide on what they want.

the thing is. if he had realised this all earlier, we wouldn't be in this mess.

and if he had realised iteven just two weeks ago, i might even have just said yes and given the bloke a chance..

but since there's been a few someone's in my life, i've realised i do deserve better. and i know ur probably wondering, how much better can it get, i mean here's a guy that LOOOOOOOVES me.

well, it could be better.

he could be not so secretive.
he could be a little more mature.
he could not tell me about how other girls want him so bad.
bla bla bla...

and its like even if i do even just THINK about gettin back with josh, things will so be totally difficult.coz he's still in school. i'm not. and in a few weeks i'm moving away.. far away. we wont see each other much. and he has his freakin exams this year. i dont want to be a distraction. i really dont. at all.and i KNOW its just not going to work out.

anyway. there's this other guy. he's so sweet. and nice. he can be funny. lol. and naughty too.

and i think he kinda sorta maybe possible likes me. at least thats what he said when i asked. but he also said he doesnt want to be the one who breaks me and josh apart coz he's been there and felt it when another guy spoils a relationship.

and you know what i told him?

i said, you can't break something that was already broken, and that he doesn't have to feel like that other guy coz josh and i were well over before he came into the picture.


anyway. i dont know what's happening now. i guess i gotta wait. a month. i dont even know what im gonna do.

hopefully, what i want to happen will happen. but i just KNOW that even THEN i'm going to get critisied for it a LOT.