Cheating Cheater.

Cheating, in my books, is one of the most unforgivable thing a person could do.

How do I define cheating? Cheating is not only sleeping with someone who is not your partner. People usually define cheating this way. But there is a line way before sleeping with someone else that is cheating. Cheating is doing.

See, sometimes when you've been in a long relationship with someone you get to occasionally having thoughts about other members of the opposite sex. For a guy, maybe the cute girl at the cashier counter in Parkson, or maybe the pretty barista in Starbucks who puts extra whipped cream in his chocolate chip cream. For a girl, maybe the hot guy at the ticket counter of GSC, or maybe that good looking guy in the music store. Whatever it is, people just tend to have little fantasies. Even fantasies about Jessica Alba and Johnny Depp (*winks*) The point is, just thinking is not exactly cheating. Cheating is when you put your thoughts into actions.

I dont know if I am making myself clear. Okay let me try this with my own experiences. When you're sitting with your partner and a hot person of your partner's gender walks by and your partner looks appreciatively, that's not cheating (it's just thoughts). Especially not if he tells you things about that person that was being admired.

Like, okay the boyfriend does this sometimes. Some girl walks past and he looks either to appreciate or to point out to me something not so nice about that person. But the point is, this is not cheating. It's just looking. We're all allowed to look sometimes. And the thing is he does it WITH me by his side. So I can't exactly accuse him of cheating can I? I'd rather he do this in front of me and we joke about this than him doing this behind my back. Am I making sense to you? Cos I'm making a hell of a lot of sense to me. But I do this sometimes. I understand what I mean. But other people don't always understand what I mean.

Anyway I'm getting off track. Cheating is when you do something you know is wrong with someone who is not your partner. Like I went out dancing with a few friends a few months ago and there was this guy who came up to me and flirted with me and danced with me. Hell he was practically rubbing himself on me. Not pretty. But then I get home and come on Facebook and I'm minding my own business checking out updates and profiles and I spotted this same guy's profile because we had friends in common and guess what? The bastard has a girlfriend. Do you get my point now? If you have a partner, you shouldn't be touching anyone else in any way that you would touch your partner. (p.s I was single then)

When you have a partner, you shouldn't be asking other people out like on dates. Especially not on the sly, as in without your partner knowing. There's nothing wrong with going out with friends as long as 1) You dont have the intention to flirt and get frisky and 2) Your partner knows something about where you're going or who you'd be with. There was this guy who had a girlfriend who used to call up or chat with one my my close friends and ask her to call him or to go over to his house. Like WTF?? If you have a girlfriend, you DO NOT freaking ask another girl over to your house because HELLO, we all know what THAT means. This is the 21st freaking century. No one is so stupid and naive anymore, well except for a handful. I mean really, could this guy BE anymore of a Mr. Obvious.

The point is, there's nothing wrong with hanging out with other people of the opposite gender and all. Just remember where your priorities and loyalties are and understand all the intentions there. Like when I go out with my friends, guy friends especially but also with my girlfriends, I make it a point to tell my partner : "So hey I'm going out with some friends.. *this person and that person* we're just gonna be hanging out *here and here*. So i'll call you later okay?" Something easy like that. And okay some of you may be like "WHY should I have to tell someone my every move" and all that. The point is, when you do little things like this, you're building trust. It's just proving that you're not doing anything wrong and that you're trustable (if that's a word). AND it's especially important if you have a partner who get extremely jealous easily. When you give them details, they will have less space to question you and your loyalty. So you get my drift now?

Anyways, where was i? Right CHEATING. Cheating is one of the few thing I really cannot forgive. No really, the few guys who have cheated on me are guys I have never trusted a second time, even if I gave them a second chance.

How could you cheat on someone that you at one point or another obviously loved very much? How could you cheat with one person and then go back to your partner so easily? I dont understand it really. I know that everyone has that little part of them that is capable of cheating no matter how strong their principles or love for their partner is. But if you're strong enough to stick to your principles and do the right thing, that makes you a better person, doesnt it?

And I know there's always the matter of the 80% and 20% thing. Thats when your partner now has the 80% of everything you ever wanted and needed in a partner. But then someone with the other 20%, not even with the 80% comes by and you want that 20% so bad. And that's when the question arises, would you really risk all you've had with the 80% person just for the 20% person? Because when you cheat, that's what you're doing. Taking a big risk.

Also, and this is directed specially to one person although I highly doubt she'd read my blog since she doesnt exactly know me. Dont forget, that if a person cheats with you, they can always cheat on you in the future. Even if a person dumps their partner for a steamy hot romance with you, always remember that if they've cheated one, they can cheat again. If he cheated on her to be with you, he can just as easily cheat on you to be with someone else. Unless you're smart and you know how to hold on to someone and keep them interested, which I hope for your sake you do.

Bottomline: Cheating? NOT COOL.

Note; Dont be a cheater. You're not cool.